Fully Loaded: In Your House

(All screen captures are the property of World Wrestling Entertainment)

Fully Loaded: In Your House

July 26, 1998

Selland Arena

Fresno, California

News & Notes: After King of the Ring, Vince held a ceremony for the new WWF champion. Vince presented Kane with the belt, but Austin interrupted. Kane didn’t bust Stone Cold open. It was The Undertaker. This bothered Steve, so he demanded a rematch. McMahon refused. Paul Bearer was too scared, so he deferred to Kane. After some goading, Kane agreed to give Austin the return bout. Before it happened, The Undertaker confessed something. He helped Kane win on purpose. Taker didn’t want to see his little brother set himself on fire. This raised a question. Were Taker and Kane in cahoots? McMahon called Taker evil, and he warned him not to get involved in Austin vs. Kane. Taker kept his word, and Stone Cold regained his gold.

Afterward, Taker confronted Austin. He wanted a title shot. It wouldn’t be that easy. First, McMahon ordered Austin and Taker to fight Kane and Mankind at the Fully Loaded. Then Vince put Taker in a Triple Threat. If he won, he’d get his championship opportunity at SummerSlam. It was Taker vs. Mankind vs. Kane. However, only Kane and Mankind arrived for the fight. Mankind refused to attack his friend and partner, but Kane had no qualms. He used a chair on Mankind and pinned him. It seemed Kane was once again #1 Contender. But wait! Kane removed his mask to reveal it was The Undertaker in disguise! Taker has his chance at SummerSlam. Where was Kane? Whose side was he on? This mystery grew deeper when Kane stopped Mankind from using a chair on Taker. Welcome to the Highway to Hell!

In other news, the WWF held a unique tournament on TV. They called it The Brawl for All. This was a series of shoot tough man competitions. The wrestlers wore boxing gloves. Each contest had three rounds. Victories came by either knock-out or a points system. They even allowed takedowns for points. Vince Russo created the idea for two reasons. First, Bradshaw bragged about how he could beat anyone in a real fight. They wanted him to put his money where his mouth is. The second reason was to showcase Dr. Death Steve Williams. JR brought Steve in. He believed Williams could win it all, and JR told everyone this. The boys hoped someone would prove Ross wrong. We’ll see how it plays out. They held the first round over the last month. Participation was voluntary. Shamrock refrained. He felt the pay wasn’t worth it. Severn competed once and withdrew. He had nothing to prove. The tournament was a terrible idea. It resulted in unnecessary injuries and damaged careers. Plus, the fans hated it. They chanted for wrestling during every fight. It’s not over, so I’ll discuss the winner in my next WWF review.

We begin with a cold opening. Lawler invades Sable’s locker room. He wants to discuss her bikini contest. Jerry asks for a brief (no pun intended) on tonight’s outfit. Sable says a picture is worth a thousand words. So how about a preview? She steps behind a backlit changing screen and removes her top. Then Sable asks if King wants a peek. Lawler takes the offer, and he hyperventilates. An excited Jerry exits the room while cackling like a maniac.

Then they show the opening video. It’s all about questions. The Undertaker buried the answers in his tortured soul. Is he in cahoots with Kane? Does blood run thicker than water? Can Austin survive the reunion of brothers? Is McMahon the patriarch of their family from hell? If none of these are true, does Taker’s hatred for Kane still burn? Will Austin and Taker temper their animosity and stand as champions? Could McMahon handle the ungodly union of renegades? They want to destroy Vince’s empire! Tonight will answer these questions. But those answers could become questions.

Fireworks explode as JR welcomes everyone to Fresno! They are ready to go and so is Val Venis. Ross calls him undefeated and controversial. Meanwhile, Lawler still wants to discuss Sable. There’s no time. Venis has a mic. He greets the Californian ladies. Val always wanted to do something. He says, “California, here I come!” Then Venis grabs the front of his trunks, but Tennessee Lee interrupts. Before Val makes a fool of himself, allow Lee to introduce Jeff Jarrett. Tennessee calls Jeff the world’s greatest lover! (He would know.) Mr. Lover arrives with Southern Justice in tow, but the ref makes them leave. While this happens, Kaientai also appears. The ref ejects them too, but Yamaguchi-san sneaks to the announce table. He does commentary for this bout and promises a surprise for Venis on RAW.

Val Venis vs. Jeff Jarrett (w/ Tennessee Lee)

Notes: The match has no build. In fact, Val Venis has an ongoing and unrelated feud. After Venis defeated Dick Togo, he spotted Yamaguchi-san’s wife in the front row. She was quite beautiful, so Val took a liking to her. Val hit on Mrs. Yamaguchi until her husband slapped him. Venis then used a chair to fend off Kaientai. Next, Venis faced Dustin Runnels. Dustin took exception to Val’s antics. Runnels is now a reformed Christian. During the bout, Yamaguchi-san sent Kaientai to put a hit on The Big Valbowski. They held Venis down and Yamaguchi-san slapped him. However, this upset his wife. She did the unthinkable. A week later, Venis interrupted Kaientai’s match. He had a surprise. It was a porno he and Mrs. Yamaguchi made! Val called it, “The Land of the Rising Venis.” Yamaguchi-san wanted to punish his wife with a public paddling. Val saved her and swept her off her feet.

The Match: Jarrett takes Val to the mat, walks on him, and struts. Venis answers with takedowns, throws, and pin attempts. He peppers in hip swivels between moves. Then Jarrett catches Venis ducking twice. Jeff uses a sunset flip and a powerbomb. Jarrett also sends Val to the floor for Tennessee Lee interference and a baseball slide. Next, Jeff counters a suplex with a DDT and they trade sleeper holds. After a series of reversals, Venis nails a belly-to-belly and a Manhattan Drop. He follows with a fisherman’s suplex on Jarrett. Jeff rallies with a boot in the corner and a flying crossbody. The Jarrett attack continues until Val catches him for a powerslam. This leads to fighting at the ropes. Venis uses a hotshot. A stumbling Jeff clips the ref, so Lee seizes the opportunity. He crotches Val on the ropes and Jarrett lands a superplex. Then Jeff tries a Figure Four. Val turns it into an inside cradle. Lee climbs on the apron to complain, so Venis runs Jarrett into him. He gives Jeff an O’Connor Roll for the three.

Thoughts: It was a solid encounter. Despite having no build, the fans were hot for it. The action was good. Val’s character makes you forget he’s a good wrestler. This showcased his talents well. But they should have had him fight a member of Kaientai. Jarrett made no sense as an opponent.

Winner: Val Venis (7:45)

Yamaguchi-san says Val should savor the victory. Tomorrow on RAW, they’ll show him what Kaientai Style means! Venis will never be the same! While he speaks, Venis grabs a mic. (No, that wasn’t a euphemism.) Val makes fun of Yamaguchi-san’s size in more ways than one. Mrs. Yamaguchi was right. Her husband will never measure up to The Big Valbowski! This infuriates Kaientai’s manager.

Then they present a view of the Hart family house in Calgary. Later, Owen and Shamrock will wrestle in the famous Hart Dungeon. After the clip, D’Lo Brown arrives for his fight. They show a recap of D’Lo winning the European title. Lawler says the champion of Europe walks with a new swagger. JR accuses him of using his chest protector as a weapon. Jim says the injury should have healed weeks ago. This leads to X-Pac’s entrance. He does crotch chops as fireworks explode in an x-shape. Ross says, “1-2-3. Three X’s!” (I see what he did there.)

D’Lo Brown (w/ The Godfather) vs. X-Pac (w/ Chyna)

Notes: D’Lo Brown used his chest protector to make the Lo Down more devastating. WWF officials allowed it because he needs the protector for his injury. Brown milked it for all its worth. He employed this tactic for a few victories. Brown used the loaded Lo Down to screw The Outlaws out of their belts. (I’ll explain later.) D’Lo even faced Triple H for the European championship. The Rock’s interference was too much for Helmsley. Brown pinned him to become the new European titleholder! DX sought revenge. X-Pac fought The Rock for the Intercontinental gold. DX and The Nation involved themselves in the action, so the referees had enough. Jimmy Korderas informed the official of the shenanigans. A DQ insured The Rock kept his title. It led to another wild scuffle between DX and The Nation. (On a side note: the match is non-title. D’Lo refused to give X-Pac a shot.)

The Match: Brown uses headlocks and shoulder blocks. X-Pac does reversals, an arm drag, a spin kick, and a hip toss. They taunt each other and trade kicks. When X-Pac misses a corner attack, D’Lo slows the action with a chinlock. Pac escapes, but Brown whips him around the ring and throws strikes. After a diving elbow, D’Lo grabs a rear chinlock. X-Pac breaks free again by hitting a jawbreaker. D’Lo answers with a clothesline and misses a moonsault. These lead to punches and kicks from Pac. He also lands a heel kick and a Bronco Buster. A worried Godfather hits Pac from the apron, so X-Pac attacks him. However, the distraction allows D’Lo to nail a surprise Sky High. It’s enough for a three.

Thoughts: Much like the first bout, the action was crisp, and it had good heat. The difference is, they had a story behind them. D’Lo is coming into his own with his new gimmick. You see more of his personality. These two matched well, and it was enjoyable. I only have one minor gripe. A match this short didn’t need two rest holds. Other than that, it was good.

Winner: D’Lo Brown (8:26)

D’Lo claims a successful title defense. He’s going home with the gold! X-Pac and Chyna look disappointed while Edge watches them from the stands. JR spots him and says something, but Lawler wants to talk about Sable. However, breaking news interrupts Jerry’s thoughts. Kevin Kelly and Tom Prichard are in the internet room. Kelly says The Undertaker hasn’t arrived yet! He’s hours late. It worries Kevin. Dr. Tom says Taker doesn’t let people down. He’ll be here.

Terry Funk and Bradshaw cut a promo for their upcoming bout. JR asks if they’re ready to face the undefeated team of Faarooq and Scorpio. Funk says what’s on paper isn’t as important as what’s in your heart. With that said, Funk announces a leave of absence after this event. Terry wants six months off to recover. He had a rough time in recent months. It shocks Bradshaw. He asks Terry why he didn’t tell him beforehand. Funk says he needs to recharge his batteries. Bradshaw says that’s great and leaves in disgust. During their entrance, Bradshaw glares at Funk.

Faarooq & Scorpio vs. Bradshaw & Terry Funk

Notes: Here’s another bout with no build. (Three matches tonight have little to no story. The Brawl for All ate up too much TV time.) Bradshaw and Scorpio competed in the Brawl for All. Scorpio defeated 8-Ball in a dark match. Bradshaw beat Mark Canterbury. Meanwhile, Faarooq appeared on one episode of RAW. He lost to Owen Hart. Rooq and Scorpio also teamed a few times on Shotgun. This encounter exists only for the Funk storyline they established in the promo.

The Match: Bradshaw backs Scorpio into the corner. He uses knees, shoulders, chops, and elbows. Scorp answers with a dropkick and a hurricanrana. Then Bradshaw and Faarooq trade blows. Bradshaw nails a flying shoulder tackle. Funk is next. Terry does a neckbreaker and a headlock. Faarooq hits a backbreaker and tries a Dominator. Funk blocks it, and Bradshaw gives Rooq a big boot. When Bradshaw tags, Faarooq catches him for a powerslam. Scorpio continues the attack with a knee-lift and a slam. He then climbs, but Funk crotches Scorp. It allows Bradshaw to do a back superplex and a powerbomb. Next, Funk returns and takes Scorpio outside. They fight over the railing and back again. When they reach the apron, Funk does a Vader Bomb to a standing Scorpio. Back in the ring, Terry attempts some pins until Faarooq attacks Funk. It allows Scorp to land a twisting splash and a diving leg drop. Bradshaw breaks up the pin and fights Faarooq. While they scuffle, Scorpio slams Funk and nails a 450 for the win.

Thoughts: It wasn’t great. They botched nothing, but it was dull. It even received a boring chant. I get they wanted to establish Funk is taking time off. But they could have done this on TV. Put this on RAW and give D’Lo vs. X-Pac more time.

Winners: Faarooq & Scorpio (6:49)

An angry Bradshaw berates Funk for his performance. He shoves Terry and then yells at Faarooq and Scorpio. Bradshaw calls their win bullshit and dares them to return. Funk wants to calm Bradshaw, but Shaw has none of it. He nails Terry with a lariat. Scorpio returns to help, so Bradshaw takes him to the floor. He nails another lariat and grabs a chair. Faarooq intervenes, so Bradshaw decks him with the weapon and leaves. A pissed-off Funk chases Bradshaw backstage. This shocks JR. He says Bradshaw is over the line. Lawler says you need this attitude to be a winner. Speaking of winners, Lawler thinks Sable will win the bikini contest. He can’t stop talking about what she wasn’t wearing.

Mark Henry vs. Vader

Notes: They didn’t interact on RAW since King of the Ring. Mark and Vader had a tug-of-war competition on Shotgun, but who watches that? Meanwhile, Mark Henry aided The Nation in their feud with DX. He also drew the ire of Chyna again. Vader fought twice on RAW. First, he faced Bradshaw. It ended when Kane and Mankind jumped both men. They did it to send a message to The Outlaws. Vader’s next fight was against The Undertaker. He lost. To make matters worse, Shawn Michaels did commentary for this bout. You can imagine how HBK spoke about him. It’s clear Vader’s time in the WWF is ending.

The Match: They collide a few times. Henry slams Vader after two tries. Vader regroups, but Henry throws punches when he returns. Mark also nails strikes, a shoulder block, and a leg drop. He follows with a sunset flip, but Vader sits on Henry! Vader then continues. He hits a splash, corner attacks, and a short-arm clothesline. It leads to fighting outside. Vader whips Mark into the steps and returns him to the ring. After more punches, Vader nails a diving splash. It only gets a two! Vader continues his attack until Henry catches him for a powerslam. Mark finishes the fight with a splash.

Thoughts: The bout was not good. Henry is still green. Vader is great, but he couldn’t carry Mark. The action was awkward, and the finish was weak. I felt bad for Vader. It’s a big victory for Henry, but the fans couldn’t care less. They’re in danger of killing this once-hot crowd.

Winner: Mark Henry (5:03)

They show another shot of the Hart family house. Then we return to Kevin Kelly and Tom Prichard. They still haven’t located The Undertaker. While they talk, Kane’s music plays in the arena.

Paul Bearer leads Kane and Mankind to the ring. They’re the new tag team champions. JR calls them the poster boys for pestilence. When Bearer gets the mic, he says he knew Taker wouldn’t show up. The Undertaker doesn’t want to wrestle his brother. He must stay in one piece for SummerSlam. Paul calls Taker a coward. He also says Austin is in the wrong place at the wrong time. Kane and Mankind will finish what they started on RAW. Taker won’t be there to help Stone Cold this time! Then Bearer almost says more, but The New Age Outlaws interrupt. Road Dogg compares everyone in the ring to the Adams Family. If Kane and Mankind are so confident, they’ll offer The Outlaws a rematch. The Outlaws help Kane and Mankind make this decision by attacking them. Officials arrive to stop the brawl. Billy Gunn ignores Sgt. Slaughter and jumps on Kane. However, Sarge ends the fight when he drags Mankind away from Billy.

Next, they recap the issues between The DOA and LOD 2000. Animal had a match against Skull, but Hawk was late. The DOA used this opportunity. They tried to run over Animal with their bikes. Hawk arrived to stop it, but The DOA still attacked them. After the recap, The DOA arrives with Paul Ellering. (More on that in a moment.)

Skull & 8-Ball (w/ Paul Ellering) vs. LOD 2000

Notes: Sunny is gone, so The LOD brought back their old manager, Paul Ellering. Or so they thought! It was a swerve. Ellering revealed he returned to manage Skull & 8-Ball instead. Paul’s new team jumped Hawk & Animal. Ellering whipped them with his rolled-up newspaper. Then Ellering led The DOA against The Headbangers. He joined the commentary table during the fight. Paul said The DOA would write the final chapter of the Legion of Doom. He also rambled about the internet and called himself Mr. Dot Com. (What does that mean?) It led to a bout between Animal and Skull. Hawk didn’t arrive with Animal. So The DOA almost drove their bikes over Animal. Hawk appeared in time to save him, but The DOA and Ellering beat up LOD 2000.

The Match: The DOA takes advantage of a ref distraction to double-team Animal. Animal does a double clothesline and tags Hawk. He nails a flying clothesline and takes Skull outside. They fight at the rail and return to the ring. There, The LOD performs a Hart Attack and a double back elbow. However, Hawk crashes into the post on a missed corner charge. It allows The DOA to cheat. Ellering throws cheap shots behind the ref’s back. He attacks on the floor and at the apron. It happens so often the announcers wonder what The LOD did to him. Why is he so angry? Skull & 8-Ball control the action with strikes, headlocks, and chinlocks. They also choke Hawk and nail a backbreaker. The attack continues until Hawk clotheslines both men. Animal makes the hot tag and cleans house. He uses a back suplex, shoulder tackles, and clotheslines. Next, The LOD both do corner clotheslines and hit a Doomsday Device. The DOA breaks up the pin, and Ellering distracts the ref. It allows Skull & 8-Ball to do Twin Magic. The fresh twin nails a DDT for the victory.

Thoughts: The action was uninteresting and slow. Then they had a poor finish. Who thought it was a good feud? Adding Paul Ellering didn’t help. He was a fine manager in the past, but he’s out of place in the Attitude Era. I wish I could say the LOD storyline gets better. It doesn’t. The unreliable Hawk angle grows worse in the coming weeks.

Winners: Skull & 8-Ball (8:50)

Vince, Slaughter, and The Stooges enter the arena. They pass the LOD and Hawk has words for McMahon. When Vince enters the ring, he takes a mic. Mr. McMahon is as upset as the fans about The Undertaker. If he doesn’t show up, don’t blame Vince! Austin almost decapitated him with a chair on RAW. Then Stone Cold gave Taker rude gestures. If Taker no-shows, it’s Austin’s fault! Vince reminds the fans all cards are subject to change. He even reads from the program. It states the promoter reserves the right to make suitable substitutions. He has a replacement for The Undertaker. If there’s no Taker, Austin will team with—The Brooklyn Brawler! An overjoyed Brawler enters the ring and hugs everyone. Vince and The Stooges say he’s ready.

Then JR explains the significance of the Hart family dungeon. Stu Hart trained many men there. He contorted the bodies of WWF superstars in that room. They show Owen and Severn waiting. Ken Shamrock opens the door and psychs himself up. When he enters, Severn tells them to fight!

Dungeon Match: Owen Hart vs. Ken Shamrock

Notes: Since Ken is the new King of the Ring, he drew the ire of the previous kings. Both Owen and Triple H wanted to test him. Shamrock still wants revenge on Owen, so Ken accepted the challenge. They booked a Triple Threat between Ken, Owen, and Hunter. Chyna prevented Owen from winning. It allowed Ken to score the victory. Owen took out his frustrations on Ken. He put him in a ring post Figure Four. On the next RAW, Ken received a visit from another former king. It was King Mabel! He interrupted Shamrock vs. Jarrett, so Ken challenged Mabel. Ken used the anklelock for an easy win. He beat up Mabel afterward. Then Shamrock backed up Blackman against Jarrett. Dan Severn was there with him. After the bout, Owen jumped Ken and attacked him on the steps. However, Severn didn’t lift a finger to help. He walked away. Later, Owen wrestled Faarooq and won. When it was over, Shamrock chased Hart into the crowd. Now they fight in the Hart Family Dungeon. Severn is the ref! It only ends by submission.

The Match: Owen scores a double-leg takedown and they grapple on the floor. Ken tries a cross armbreaker and a leglock. Then Shamrock nails a judo toss and rams Owen against the wall. Owen throws a low blow and a wheel kick. He also uses mounted punches and slams Ken’s head on the wall. Ken returns that favor. Next, Shamrock whips Owen from one end of the room to the other. Owen hangs off the pipes and does a kick and a hurricanrana. Ken rallies with more strikes and shoves Hart against the weight rack. Owen tries a dumbbell shot. Ken blocks it. After more strikes, Ken also hangs off the pipes. He uses his legs for a triangle choke. Owen turns it into a powerbomb. Ken is groggy, so Owen throws him at the pipe. After this, Owen lifts Shamrock head-first into the ceiling. It leaves a dent! This leads to a Sharpshooter, but Ken powers out of it. Ken attempts an anklelock. Hart blocks it. Shamrock throws kicks next. One nails Severn by mistake! With Dan unconscious, Owen grabs a dumbbell. He clocks Ken and locks him in a crossface. Severn stirs, so Owen grabs Ken’s hand. He makes the passed-out Shamrock tap. Severn can only see Ken’s hand, so he buys it. Owen celebrates and says he did it all by himself!

Thoughts: It was a unique and intense fight. I’m a sucker for aesthetics. Unusual locations interest me. They made the best of this one. I liked the spots with the pipes. Plus, Owen’s antics amused me.

Winner: Owen Hart (4:46)

Next is the 2 out of 3 Falls Match for the Intercontinental title. The Fink says there will be one-minute rests between falls. Both Triple H and The Rock bring their factions with them. Sgt. Slaughter has none of this. He makes most of them leave. However, Chyna has a manager’s license. She can stay. This pisses off The Rock. Meanwhile, JR mentions the thirty-minute time limit. (Why did he mention that? Uh, oh.)

2 out of 3 Falls for the Intercontinental Title: The Rock (c) vs. Triple H (w/ Chyna)

Notes: As I mentioned earlier, Triple H fought Owen and Shamrock in a Triple Threat. During the bout, The Rock clocked Hunter with the IC belt. It caused a scuffle between DX and The Nation. The next week, DX did a parody skit to mock The Nation. They dressed as Nation members. Hunter was The Crock. Road Dogg became B’Lo. Billy Gunn dressed as The Godfather. X-Pac was Mizark Henry. And a comedian named Jason Sensation played Owen. They filled the segment with sophomoric poop jokes. It also included some unfortunate blackface, so they removed it from the Network. The next week, The Nation returned the insults. Then Owen attacked Jason Sensation at the commentary table. He put him in a sharpshooter, so DX fought The Nation again. It led to Rock & Owen vs. Hunter & X-Pac. During the bout, they announced this 2 out of 3 Falls encounter. DX won the tag match after Triple H nailed Rocky with the European title. The Nation avenged itself. D’Lo used the chest-protected Lo Down of Death! It cost The Outlaws their tag gold.

The Match: They trade strikes and whip each other around the ring. Then they brawl in the aisle, at the railing, and into the steps. Back in the ring, Hunter nails a swinging neckbreaker and a knee drop. Rocky answers by taking Helmsley outside for a suplex. He then distracts the ref so Mark Henry can splash Triple H. Billy Gunn arrives to stop it. The ref sends them to the back again. Meanwhile, The Rock grabs the belt and clocks Hunter. It only gets a two! Maivia uses more cheating, a sloppy float-over DDT, and chinlocks. After more fighting back and forth, The Godfather returns. Both Outlaws stop this and chase him backstage. Meanwhile, Rocky distracts the ref so D’Lo can intervene. (He takes forever. The Rock curses.) Hunter catches Brown and hits him with the European title. But the distraction allows Rocky to land a Rock Bottom for the first fall. (First Fall: The Rock)

After the rest period, they fight on the floor again. The Rock blocks a Pedigree and catapults Hunter into the announce table. Back inside, Rocky does the People’s Elbow. It only earns a two. Outside the ring, D’Lo recovers and fights Chyna. It distracts the ref. X-Pac uses the opening to give Rocky an X-Factor! Hunter only gets a two! Next, Rock and Hunter fight over a chair. The Rock steals it, but he hits the ref by mistake. Chyna uses the opening to DDT Rocky onto the chair. Helmsley covers for the second fall. (Second Fall: Triple H)

During the break, Hebner replaces Chioda. Earl is late for a pin. The kick-out leads to more brawling outside the ring. When they return, Rocky ducks for a backdrop. Hunter turns it into a face crusher. One minute remains! Triple H continues his attack, but Rock counters with a Samoan Drop. This leads to an exchange of strikes. Hunter blocks a Rock Bottom and scores a Pedigree, but the time expires.

Thoughts: It started slowly, but they built into something good. I’m even fine with the finish because I know this rivalry continues. It wasn’t their best match, but it’s solid. Rock and Hunter have a much better encounter next month. They did a decent job making both men look good and furthering the storyline.

Winner: Time Limit Draw (30:00)

The Nation jumps Hunter, so DX arrives to brawl. Then the Outlaws and X-Pac send them packing. They help Hunter to his feet. Rocky leaves, but he raises his belt to taunt Helmsley.

Meanwhile, Kevin Kelly says The Undertaker entered the building during the last match. They show footage of this happening. Dr. Tom says he told everyone so! But Kelly wonders if he had time to talk strategy with Austin.

Next, we see exclusive footage of The Rock leaving the arena. He says Chyna’s interference didn’t matter. Rocky planted Triple H with a Rock Bottom. He’s still the best damn Intercontinental champion! If Hunter wants a rematch, he’ll smell what The Rock is cooking.

Then they recap the Sable/Jackie feud. They called each other a skank and a tramp. Sable implied Mero has performance issues. Jackie compared her body to Sable’s. She challenged Sable to a bikini contest! Sable promised an outfit to rival her Slammys attire. Next, more insults led to catfights. Jackie ripped Sable’s dress. Sable threatened to drop a bomb on Jacqueline.

JR presents a tale of the tape. It lists Sable and Jackie’s measurements. Meanwhile, Lawler enters the ring to host the following contest. But he isn’t alone. Dustin Runnels is there to conduct prayer. He wants the Lord to forgive these hopeless, lost souls. Dustin asks him to shun Satan away and close the eyes of the viewers. The prayer disgusts Lawler. Dustin doesn’t care. He reminds everyone the messiah is coming soon, so they should get ready. Once Runnels leaves, Jerry introduces the Bikini Contest.

Bikini Contest: Jacqueline (w/ Marc Mero) vs. Sable

Notes: Mero lost his first-round Brawl for All fight. (They give him a second chance. Blackman gets injured.) Jackie said Mero only lost because he went twelve rounds with her the previous night. These comments lured out Sable for a confrontation. Sable insulted Marc’s manhood and Jackie’s body. Jacqueline claimed her body was prime real estate, but Sable is a skank. Sable agreed about Jackie’s body being real estate. She rented it to everyone! The insult was too much. Jackie challenged Sable to a bikini contest to prove who had the better body. Then Sable intervened to stop Jackie’s interference in a Mero fight. The distraction cost Marc a victory. An angry Marc and Jackie gave Sable one chance to back out of this contest or else. She refused, so Jackie ripped Sable’s dress and they scuffled. During the chaos, Edge emerged from the crowd. He gave Mero a move called The Downward Spiral (Flatliner). Why did he do it? You’ll have to wait and see.

The Match: Mero escorts Jackie to the ring. Lawler asks her to disrobe, but Sable interrupts. Jerry accepts it. He’s too excited. Once Sable is in the ring, Jerry says the challenger goes first. Jackie removes her robe to reveal a red thong bikini. It covers little. She pops out of her top, so Lawler says they got a free shot. However, the fans boo her effort. Sable is next. She removes her shirt, but what is underneath confuses Lawler. It’s not the outfit Sable wore earlier. She has a conservative top that covers almost everything.

Sable explains what happened. McMahon pulled her into his office. He told her to wear something conservative. Since she owes him her job, she should listen. But she won’t. Sable has her own ideas about what is conservative. It’s live TV. Vince can’t do anything! Sable removes her top to unveil hand-shaped pasties! Lawler loses his mind. Mero attempts to cover Sable, so she slaps him. Marc calls this cheating. That isn’t a bikini! Lawler asks the fans if Sable should cover herself. They say no and cheer her as the winner. But wait! A wild Vince McMahon appears! He places his coat over Sable and escorts her out of the ring. Sable disappointed Mr. McMahon with her actions. Mero says Jackie wins because that was no bikini.

Thoughts: I won’t bemoan this stuff. We know why they did it. It served its purpose. The crowd needed some levity after the previous match. It keeps the fans from getting restless before the main event. Plus, they furthered Vince’s heel character. The fans hated him for covering Sable. WWF officials rule it a DQ win for Jackie. Sable violated Vince’s edict.

Winner: Jacqueline (by DQ)

Afterward, they show exclusive footage. Jackie storms into Sable’s locker room. They scream at each other while the officials arrive. Sgt. Slaughter and Dave Hebner ask Jacqueline to leave before things escalate.

They recap the main event. Austin regained his gold after King of the Ring. Then he gave The Undertaker a Stunner. The attack uncaged The Phenom. No one in the WWF could contain his rage. Taker attacked wrestlers, so Vince called him evil and diabolical. The Undertaker claimed everyone would call him The Lord of Darkness. He wants a title shot at Austin! If Taker and Stone Cold want to fight, Vince had an offer. They can team to face Kane and Mankind at Fully Loaded. But the road to destiny is full of questions. Where does Taker’s loyalty lie? The Undertaker told anyone who asked to go to hell. Because of his attitude, Austin and Taker couldn’t coexist. Stone Cold wants to know if he’s entering an ambush at the PPV. Is it two-on-two or three-on-one? Austin will beat someone’s ass even without Taker’s help. The dissension led to chair shenanigans. Taker hit Kane, but did he mean to strike Austin?

JR and Lawler contemplate Austin’s situation during Kane & Mankind’s entrance. Is it a trap? Lawler thinks so. After all, Taker faces Austin at SummerSlam. This leads to The Undertaker’s arrival. He uses a new hard rock remix of his theme. JR calls Taker the conscience of the WWF. No one demands more respect from his peers. But he only arrived twenty minutes ago! Austin and Taker had no time to talk about strategy. Lawler calls it mind games. Ross reminds Jerry about Austin’s chair shot to Taker. When Austin joins the fray, Taker confronts him in the aisle. However, Kane and Mankind jump them before anything happens.

Tag Team Title Match: Stone Cold Steve Austin & The Undertaker vs. Kane & Mankind (c) (w/ Paul Bearer)

Notes: Kane & Mankind received their tag title shot two weeks after King of the Ring. As I mentioned, D’Lo Brown helped them win the gold. It made this bout a tag title opportunity, but whose side is The Undertaker on? His recent actions created questions. Everyone wanted to know. Were Taker and Kane in cahoots? Paul Bearer said no. But Austin, McMahon, and DX questioned Taker. He refused to answer. Triple H suggested an Outlaws vs. Kane & Mankind rematch. Austin & Taker would be enforcers. Their actions would reveal the truth. However, Austin and Taker prevented each other from counting pin attempts. It appeared Taker favored Kane & Mankind. A wild fight between Austin and Taker ruined the bout. It infuriated McMahon. He demanded Taker confess his true intentions. When he didn’t, Vince put Taker in a Handicap fight against Kane & Mankind. But Taker beat up Vince & Co. and left. So McMahon put Austin in Taker’s place. While Kane and Austin fought, Taker returned carrying a chair. He swung at both men. Austin ducked. The chair hit Kane. Was he Taker’s target? Since Austin didn’t know, he laid out Taker with the chair and left.

The Match: Everyone brawls in the aisle until Taker rolls Mankind into the ring. Austin flips off Taker and exchanges strikes and holds against Mankind. Then Kane tags. Austin lands a Thesz Press and mounted punches. Kane avoids a Stunner and regroups. It leads to Austin fighting Kane and Mankind on the floor. He does a double noggin knocker. Next, Taker tags and hits a Russian Leg Sweep on Kane. Afterward, Taker flips off Austin. It allows Mankind to tag. Taker nails corner splashes and Old School. However, Kane and Mankind take control. They use frequent tags and hard strikes. Mankind even bites Taker and hits a running knee. He follows with a Double-Arm DDT and a Cactus Clothesline. Taker is on the floor, so Mankind tries a Cactus Elbow. Austin shoves him onto the announce table to stop it.

Taker fends off more Kane attacks and nails Mankind with a jumping DDT. Kane tries to stop him, but he knocks Taker into Austin’s tag! Stone Cold cleans house. He throws punches, stomps, and a Boss Man Attack on Kane. Meanwhile, Taker and Mankind brawl outside. Mankind throws Kane a chair, but Austin grabs it. He clocks Kane, but the pin only gets a two! Kane recovers and pulls Stone Cold to the floor. They fight at the rail and the tables. Kane and Mankind use more strikes and clotheslines. They block Austin’s tag and Kane lands a leg drop. Mankind and Kane also double-team Steve when Taker distracts the ref. Next, Austin avoids a Tombstone and gives Kane a Stunner. But Mankind grabs the claw! Austin breaks it with another Stunner! He crawls for a tag, but Taker hesitates. JR thinks Taker is showing his true colors until Taker reaches out his hand. Taker tags and cleans house. He gives Mankind a low blow and chokeslams both Kane and Mankind. Taker follows with a Tombstone to Kane for the win. Austin prevents Mankind from stopping the pin.

Thoughts: It was fun. The action almost dragged in the middle, but they finished strong. Fans reacted well to the ending. I also liked the storytelling between Austin and Taker. Plus, I must commend Mankind for his performance. It’s insane he’s still working after Hell in a Cell. Mick took bumps he didn’t need to do. Once again, the main event delivers even if the undercard doesn’t.

Winners: Steve Austin & The Undertaker (New Champions) (18:08)

Taker collects both belts and leaves the ring. Austin yells at him. He demands Taker return, but The Undertaker ignores him. JR says the Highway to Hell got interesting. Be sure to join them for SummerSlam!

The Good:

• The main event was fun.

• Rock/Triple H was slow but solid.

• D’Lo/X-Pac was enjoyable.

• Owen/Shamrock was unique.

The Bad:

• The DOA/LOD match.

• Henry/Vader was a mess.

• Some matches had no build.

Performer of the Night:

I’m giving it to D’Lo Brown. He’s coming into his own with his character. This is one of the more entertaining runs of his career. Plus, his match with X-Pac was good.

Final Thoughts:

The overall quality was in the middle of the road. It contained some good stuff. The main even was once again quite good. And only two bouts were bad. However, much of this felt unimportant. This would make an excellent episode of RAW. As a PPV, it’s average. It’s not a bad event, but it’s not thrilling.

Thank you for reading. My next review is ECW’s Heat Wave ’98. Look for it next Sunday!